Well, betches, we are back for yet another week of The Bachelor, or as I like to call it these days, What New And Exciting Personality Will Queen Victoria Develop Next? Rachael shows up to the dinner in a hot little red number that has Matt actually licking his lips at the sight of her. They’ve done nothing this quarantine but perfect their, I guess the producers could tell Matt was scared for his life, because they bring in Ben Higgins to put some pep in his step. That said, Katie actually handled this super maturely. . This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do – because honestly, why … Matt James Opens Up About Bachelor Racism Controversies “It has been devastating and heartbreaking, to put it bluntly.” By Madeleine Aggeler the bachelor Nov. 12, 2020 Don’t be so naïve! On a group date. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. Cut to the cocktail party, and Matt thinks he’s some sort of hero just because he stopped the cage fights before anyone was permanently maimed. . He can see how hostile it is in the house and is doing nothing to manage it. Grow up, Anna, we’re all escorts when we don’t want to drop $18 on a vodka cran. This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do – because honestly, why else watch the show if not for the commentary? Welcome to the brand-new Betches. Subscribe to The Betches Newsletter so you're not the only one in the group chat who doesn't know WTF is going on when we talk about celebs, reality TV, & more. It took me and my therapist an entire year just to talk through the time the samples boy at Costco did not return my flirting, and you think one ambush is gonna cut it? The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. She’s pulling out alllll the stops. Carry on, gals. You’ve only whetted their appetite for fresh blood. More evidence that Matt is super into Michelle: He shows up to dinner showing zero skin from the chin down. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. Now that Matt got the Chuck E. Cheese thing out of his system, he’s ready to make sweet, sweet love to the longest-limbed human I’ve ever seen. Until then! They’re pouring hot butter on each other, rubbing oatmeal into every crevice of their bodies, soaking in baths of what I assume is unpasteurized milk—this entire date is a cautionary tale my gyno told me to scare me about getting UTIs. Two weeks ago, Matt narrowed his group of women down to the final three: Michelle, Bri, and Rachael. Isn’t that exciting, buddy? Honestly, don’t feel bad girl, a producer was definitely holding that answer up on a cue card behind your back! I’m not sure what Matt was hoping to get from this conversation, but their talk ends amicably. For those of you who don’t know, Ben Higgins is a former Bachelor and the first to ever say “I love you” to two different women in a season. She’s cooking breakfast with pants that have slits up to her vagine. On a group date. Vomit. Formerly published as “It’s Britney, Betch” she’s the resident recapper for all things ‘Bachelor.' They just told these women—women who are gainfully employed and presumably have college degrees, or at least very rich fathers—to carry those acorns in their mouths like baby squirrels. I’m shocked. You gotta wonder what she did in a past life to deserve this fate, especially as you take in the look of shock and disgust on her face as she watches these women fake spar. The cast photos are out for Katie’s upcoming season of The Bachelorette and our hosts are reacting to every guy. The Bachelor Drama That Just Keeps On Giving @Betches English - February 24, 2021 22:00 - ★★★★ - 1.4K ratings Comedy health business interview entrepreneurship comedy advice dating life below deck the real ho Homepage Download Apple Podcasts Google Podcasts Overcast Castro Pocket Casts RSS feed Happy International Women’s Day, people!! All is right in the world. Matt and Bri bond over their absentee fathers, and he is really using this same story to get into all of their pants. I mean, with wingspans like that, if they ever procreate their children could reform Mt. Okay, Rachael is being reallll pouty on this date. I think Matt is attracted to her and understands her, but they’re almost too similar or something. Rachael is last this week, which I’m convinced was a strategic move on production’s part so the viewers back home could watch her slowly come apart at the seams over the last 90 minutes of this episode. Formerly published as “It’s Britney, Betch” she’s the resident recapper for all things ‘Bachelor.' Also, Matt does not look excited about this at all. Of course Victoria treats the entire spectacle like it’s her own personal civil war. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. Like, why does she look like she just escaped the Texas Chainsaw Massacre? MATT: The girls are coming in by the truckload, and Matt looks like he has seen less carnage on a football field during rivals week than what he’s about to witness when he walks back into that rose ceremony. Speaking of body counts, here’s who gets eliminated at the rose ceremony: I’m shocked that four out of the five new girls who showed up tonight got roses. I have no idea what “Neo Soul” means either but I’ve only ever used the word “Neo” to describe Nazis, and his haircut isn’t helping that. I think she actually says that Brittany “entertains men for money” which, like, who among us hasn’t? I love these shows so much, I yell at every episode on my Instagram stories. The rest of the group date from last week (because, yes, we still have to finish out a group date) goes about as well as can be expected. The cameras cut to their morning after and she’s draped in lace and silk. Topics include the Bachelor In Paradise assault scandal & what it means to have consensual sex. I don’t think he wants to end up with someone who has a similar family situation. The Bachelor Season Premiere Recap: Just Vibing Matt James’s season is off to a bland, chemistry-light start, but at least Vibratin’ Katie brought the prop comedy. Sidenote: Matt is kind of the worst. MATT: You cheated on my mom and that has permanently altered the way I trust people and engage in romantic relationships. Matt and Rudi are running around in swimsuits, beelining for the hot tub ON NIGHT ONE. Hands!!! They go on a hot air balloon which is firmly tethered to the ground. It has the same energy, does it not? The more Matt and Michelle talk, the more I feel like they are pretty perfect for each other, which I’m sure means Matt will run as fast and as far away from her as possible. This feeling is only reinforced when every single girl in the house says they’re excited to get their time with Matt tonight. Grant appeared on Jojo’s season of the Bachelorette, Bachelor in Paradise, and Bachelor in Paradise Australia. What are you, 12? Um, Matt, I’m glad you’re working on yourself and all of that, but don’t you think you should have worked on those intimacy issues before coming on a show that ends in a rapid-speed engagement? This isn’t a risk! We don’t even get a morning after from Matt and Rachael’s date, and that’s how you know the sex was good. This week Kay is joined by her boyfriend (and recent Bachelor convert) Matt Paré to talk about being a new member of Bachelor Nation. I think this is supposed to be relaxing and romantic, a way for Matt to literally butter Michelle up before she finds out in the fantasy suite that Matt’s open-eye kissing thing extends to other parts of the bedroom as well…. Okay, Matt is even gigantic compared to his own father. Betches.com ; SIGN UP. Like, do you know her or did she just show up on your explore page on Instagram? betches.com — Hi, I’m Jared Freid. Trends come and go, but overwhelmingly the credo for brows lately has been: the bigger, the better. 145k. You can tell she was hoping to pass it off as her own. I guess the producers could tell Matt was scared for his life, because they bring in Ben Higgins to put some pep in his step. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. To … Be the first to know about new collections, sales, and exclusive promos. I just don’t understand why Rachael is so freaked out. Over the years, there have been several impressive introductions but there have been a bunch of cringe-worthy moments too. No one could “pitch a tent” in pants that tight. She managed to not only redeem her middle school bully status within the house (while still looking and acting like the hungover raccoon she’s always been) but she also managed to make the girl with the dying dad into look worse than Ted Bundy. Matt looks like he would rather be in a dark room listening to “. That’s a risk for love. Host Jackie Maroney chats with former contestant Grant Kemp about this week’s episode of The Bachelor, Colton’s virginity and Grant’s upcoming projects. I’m imagining Rachael staggering out of that suite, her neck raw from Matt’s turtleneck chafing. Keep that stuff to yourself. She’s speaking his love language!! The rest of the group date from last week (because, yes, we still have to finish out a group date) goes about as well as can be expected. 'The Bachelor' finale all came down to who will Matt choose? A woman is allowed to do whatever the f*ck she wants to do with HER OWN BODY with whoever she wants to do it with. They start by reviewing the casting archetypes we see each season so you know who to look out for. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do – because honestly, why … I don’t have much to say about this date. I’ve watched lions dismember gazelles on the Discovery Channel with less bloodlust than is currently taking place on my screen. For more info check out weekly recaps at Betches.com or follow our Instagram, … Be honest here. Ryanne wants you to know that her name is pronounced “Ryan” and that this is her childhood trauma. For more info check out weekly recaps at Betches.com or follow our Instagram, … They’ve done nothing this quarantine but perfect their Keto diets, Chris! Save something for the bedroom, buddy! Oh, honey, baby, sweetie, no. Has Harry Potter destroyed one of her horcruxes or something? For more info check out weekly recaps at Betches.com or follow our Instagram, … This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do – because honestly, why … Parler? And she is terrifying. But before we get to the sex, Matt tells us he can’t move forward in his Bachelor journey without first solving his daddy issues. Matthew! RACHAEL: This week is the lowest I’ve ever felt. Nose to the ground, honey! How does one amass a wardrobe that consists of turtlenecks and skinny jeans and almost nothing else? This is the most emotion I’ve seen out of him all season, and I’m including the time he almost killed Bri with a dune buggy. Plus, she left her high-powered job for this. To clear things up, we're fact-checking claims from Matt, Victoria, Anna, MJ and more. Like, she knows you already rubbed hundreds of dollars worth of raw milk all over Michelle’s supple body yesterday, and you think she’s not gonna judge that y’all’s first time involved thermal underwear and a rock wedged in her spine? ... r/thebachelor is a subreddit dedicated to thoughtful discussion about The Bachelor franchise, the lives of contestants, and how Bachelor Nation interacts with and influences the world around us. Matt is a 32-year-old Neo Soul singer from Encino, California. A far cry from the boiled water and power bar situation Bri was probably envisioning hours earlier. I believe he stole that line directly from an episode of My Super Sweet 16 when Ava’s dad refused to import foreign male models to act as eye candy for the occasion. matt soldiering on through his bachelor journey: The only stand-out moment from the evening comes in the form of Chelsea, or as the viewers back home know her: the bald hottie. So, I guess when Matt said earlier that this was “HIS journey” he really meant “HIS journey with the hottest women on this show.” That’s the only reason I can think of for why he would keep complete strangers on this show. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. HOLY SH*T. Bri is going home? Matt says he’ll try more too—he’ll try more to muster up the energy to pretend to want to bang those three women who are in love with him. You can tell Matt is really into Michelle because he came dressed to the date wearing jeans that are actually painted on him. I’ve seen a lot of girls over the years try to bring the Bachelor into house drama and it usually amounts to their ultimate downfall. Last week, we watched Victoria pull the single greatest PR stunt since Kris Jenner turned a sex tape into a billion-dollar career. That’s right: Fantasy Suites are here! 4.1k. CHRIS HARRISON: We’re bringing in more new women for you, Matt! But in the end, it was Abbie who missed out on the final rose. Images: ABC / Craig Sjodin; Giphy (6); @bachelorettewindmill /Instagram (1); ABC (1). Matt’s dad says he’s going to try more. Casandra is a 25-year-old social worker who says, “coming on The Bachelor is the biggest risk she’s ever taken for love” and I would have to disagree. To be a fly on the wall when they tell their kids their love story started with Daddy sending Mommy a message that said, “your Instagram makes me so horny, can I get your number?” If People doesn’t cover this in their wedding exclusive, they’re crazy! Isn’t that exciting, buddy? Seriously, where does this man shop? Bachelor Premiere: The Queen’s Dildo Ft. Jared Freid. I honestly can’t tell. Someone is definitely going to go into concussion protocol after this date. This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do because honestly. Now all of America knows who gives the worst blowjobs. Welcome back, friends, to your regularly scheduled Bachelor recap! to. Matt writes music for TV shows, commercials, and sometimes other artists, which means he’s talented. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. Obviously, she’s feeling threatened by Brittany and her connection with Matt, but there has been a crazy amount of outright slut-shaming this season. New look, same us. I get that he hasn’t done this before and so maybe he doesn’t understand the dynamics of living in a house with a bunch of other people who are trying to bang the same person you are, but he does have working eyes and ears. By Jared Freid. The hosts of “The Betchelor” podcast, Chris Burns and Kay Brown, stop by to talk about staying relevant in the populated social media space and whether influencers are the new celebrities. 57.9k Followers, 918 Following, 3,162 Posts - See Instagram photos and videos from KAYYORKCITY (@kayyorkcity) Meanwhile, Chris looks very unperturbed that his lead is about to be mauled alive by a pack of rabid former beauty queens. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. Okay, why does this morning after look so tame? Ladies, this is not what we marched for! This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do – because honestly, why … But perhaps I’m reading too much into these strangers’ lives. ALSO MICHELLE: Michelle accepts the overnight invitation, and BOY, to be a fly on the wall when she explains this to her fourth graders in a few weeks. We’ll have to wait until next week to see if Matt actually does anything with this information. Has Casandra ever been on a dating app?! This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do – because honestly, why … Like, did they lose sleep having hot sex or because Michelle taught him the song to remember all the U.S. Presidents? @Betches is a weekly pop culture podcast covering the topics you actually want to hear, like analyzing celebrity breakups, influencer scandals, the TV shows we’re all watching, and important news (like if Stormi did in fact receive her Birkin for Christmas). The minute you show an ounce of happiness, production will be there ready and willing to burn down your childhood home if it means they can get some waterworks out of you to up their ratings. Brittany, of course, denies the escort rumors, along with the rumors that she shot JFK and fabricated the 9/11 attacks. My heart is truly breaking for her. The Bachelor 2020 airs on ABC this evening with an all-new Monday, January 11, 2021, season 25 episode 2 and we have your The Bachelor recap below.On tonight’s The Bachelor season 25 episode 2 as per the ABC synopsis, “The 24 women who survived the rose ceremony on arrival night discover that dating Matt is intoxicating although the atmosphere among the women is plain toxic. She shouldn’t be able to hold any sway over these ladies and their reputations! This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do – because honestly, why else watch the show if not for the commentary? Why ABC continues to give this guy any airtime is beyond me. Kit is one of 32 contestants who met matt, a 29 year old real estate agent from raleigh, north carolina, on the monday, january 4, premiere of the bachelor season 25. the other women who met matt. ABC has vetted Matt more than any of your aunts have vetted their friend’s son. For more info check out weekly recaps at Betches.com or follow our Instagram, @thebetchelor. Of course Victoria treats the entire spectacle like it’s her own personal civil war. The Betchelor By Betches Media. She’s going to be ripped apart on the internet for this, and deservedly so. He met his fiancée by sliding into her DMs. She might as well have slipped a condom into his wallet while she was at it. Catch her on Instagram (@ryprobst) where she’s either posting pictures of her dog or sliding into the DMs of former reality TV dating stars (you know who you are). Well, get in line, buddy, because so do I. He could fit his dad in the pocket of his jeggings! Honestly, I think she’s going about this all wrong. See you next week for the epic finale to a season that definitely wasn’t already spoiled for us five weeks ago. Dear Betches are about a girl who has to choose between her dream job and her dream boyfriend and a... – Lyssna på #38 Bachelor In Paradise Is Spring Break For Fame Whores av @Betches direkt i din mobil, surfplatta eller webbläsare - utan app. I think he knows she’s really hot and really into him and it’s giving him the craziest boner. Catch her on Instagram (@ryprobst) where she’s either posting pictures of her dog or sliding into the DMs of former reality TV dating stars (you know who you are). Bachelor drama is over for another season, with Matt Agnew picking his winner once and for all - on a romantic vacation in South Africa. Not the holidays, but those are coming up too: Bachelor Bio days! KRIS JENNER WATCHING QUEEN V DESTROY SARAH FROM HER LIVING ROOM, ALREADY ON HER SECOND BOTTLE OF CHARDONNAY: I will say, every week Victoria looks more and more beat up. Betches Breakdown of Matt’s Contestants. This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do – because honestly, why else watch the show if not for the commentary? The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. I think the date card reads something like “you gotta fight for love” and all of the girls know to immediately start filing their nails into makeshift shivs. I’ve never seen such a thing take place in this franchise. According to Amy Kaufman’s book, Bachelor Nation, leads also get paid according to how much they would make at their real jobs, so, really, the Bachelorette salaries run the gamut. This weekly podcast follows the latest episodes and makes fun of all the ridiculous things the contestants say and do – because honestly, why else watch the show if … Enter Vibrator Girl, who just wishes we could all get along like we used to in middle school, and takes it upon herself to make Matt aware of the drama in the house. The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by Kay Brown, Chris Burns and Jared Freid of Betches Media.. Anna asks Brittany straight-up if she’s an escort in front of the entire group (and casually all of America when this finally aired). What? ground. Truly, they hold about as much water in terms of rumors. Bri’s up next, and she’s about as confident about her place in Matt’s heart as I am that I can pull off mom jeans. One of the most memorable parts of the date comes when Michelle quotes Maya Angelou and is genuinely surprised that Matt is able to distinguish it as a Maya quote. I have a feeling she is not talking about where they’re going to sleep tonight. 4.1k. He didn’t need quality time, he just needed this story to recycle in case he ever felt like getting laid. First up: what’s going on with the cut-out of that crop top? He was already barely holding off a coup before this, now he’ll be lucky to escape his season with both his eyebrows after this development. I just really wish I could see this for her. The hosts of Betches' The Betchelor Podcast, ... join the girls to talk about everything Bachelor franchise. I mean I know she’s a model, but still. How she can’t see this train wreck coming from a mile away is beyond me. And she is. Next they reveal their “Bachelor- Greatest of All Time” POC screen time counter which clocked in at a whopping 3 minutes and 15 seconds. ... r/thebachelor is a subreddit dedicated to thoughtful discussion about The Bachelor franchise, the lives of contestants, and how Bachelor Nation interacts with and influences the world around us. But she’s wearing a high-neck dress! New York, United States About Podcast The Betchelor is a Bachelor recap podcast presented by social producer Kay Brown of Betches Media and former Bachelorette heartthrob and Bachelor in Paradise winner Derek Peth.
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